I can't breathe out the right side of my face
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize