Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(914): View more from New York

I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.

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(661): View more from California

Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.

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(540): View more from Virginia

i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building

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(203): View more from Connecticut

theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(312): View more from Illinois

That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.

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(810): View more from Michigan

Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.

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(714): View more from California

i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo

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(710): View more from

my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am

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(254): View more from Texas

I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!

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