shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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