I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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