So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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