put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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