I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
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I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
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I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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