Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize