the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize