okay pat passed out under dana's car
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
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