the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize