the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize