our cab driver is having phone sex.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize