The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize