I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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