respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
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I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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