No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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