Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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