in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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