Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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