Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
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I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
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The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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