we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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