found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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