You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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