it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize