What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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