Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize