his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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