All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
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omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
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Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Sorry about my life...
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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