i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize