idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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