I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
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