Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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