Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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