Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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