He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize