so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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