i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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