He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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