You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He? As in you personified your dick?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize