If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize