we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Barsexuality is the new black.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize