I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
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I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
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Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize