I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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