I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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