I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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