I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
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Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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