i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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