glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize