Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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